I can't help but feeling that there's some sort of black cloud over my school... Over the past few years there have been a large number of incidents involving the health of staff members or of family members of the staff. I suppose when you have any large number of people working together, things are bound to happen, but it just seems to me that we've had an extraordinary amount of things happening... There's been cancer, thyroid problems, female problems (with surgeries and some with complications), a miscarriage, vehicle accidents, strokes, and an assortment of other ailments. There have even been deaths, the most recent being a close friend's father on Thursday morning. I know there must be a reason for all of this. God wouldn't give any of us more than we can handle, but what is it that it seems like something is always happening/going wrong? We have a very strong staff and an amazing administration - we're very close and it is definitely like working with family. Is that why we're being tested with all of this? I know we're not necessarily meant to know why things happen, but that doesn't make it any easier. We've had a lot of good times, too - weddings, births, celebrations of numbers of years on staff... but with the one staff member's father's passing on Thursday, it is fresh in our minds just how much has been happening to the staff. It's difficult for me to imagine what it's like to lose a family member, but my heart goes out to my friend.
We had a staff meeting first thing Thursday morning. I had this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was afraid of the bad news we were going to receive. I had no real reason to think it was bad, except the feeling I had. We get to the meeting and find out it's because one of our staff members was being recognized at the board that evening for 25 years of teaching in county. So I felt relieved, though still uneasy. An hour and a half later I found out about my friend's father. I was devastated for her. I still am. I plan to attend the services if I can get the time off. I am hoping she is comforted by the memories she has of her father - that's all we can hope for when anyone loses a loved one. I know in time she and her family members will begin to heal and move on in their lives.
I find myself praying for us to catch a break at my school. I just don't know what God has in store for us, and that's very difficult. As a friend said to me in an e-mail - "I'm tired of God thinking I can handle all of this." I hope God continues to give every one of us the strength to handle anything that is dealt to us in life (I have faith that he will, but that doesn't make this any easier for anyone on staff going through something).
Thought of the day: "Everything happens for a reason... Just believe."
It's windy and chilly. It snowed for about 20 minutes. There wasn't enough snowfall to have any accumulation but I still enjoyed it. It's the kind of day that makes me thankful for a fuzzy green blanket (a present from Mom and Dad) and a mug of cappuccino from my Keurig (also a present from Mom and Dad - the Keurig, not the mug of cappuccino). So anyway, I'm curled up on the couch, all toasty, looking out the window, feeling all artsy, and I can't decide what to do. Of course, right? Maybe I should just enjoy the moment and read. I do have the perfect situation for reading a good book. Yes, I think that sounds perfectly splendid.
Thought of the day: "Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams." ~Ashley Smith
This is from today's flash snowfall.
It's been two weeks. I miss my little angel SO much. I can't believe it was only a year after we lost Cinnamon Bun that we lost Flower Pot. I wish I had something awesome or profound to say, but alas, I am at a loss for words. I just have this hole in my heart for my two little bunny angels. But I'm so thankful to have had the chance to love them and feel their love in return.
The best part of all of this is that it seems my Stormy Bear is a very happy solo bun. He has really come out of his shell since Flower died. He is much more social with me and even doesn't seem to mind anymore if pick him up. He comes up to me all the time now to get his head rubbed. This thrills me to no end as I was very worried he would become depressed without some company, especially since I am gone a lot during the week. We'll see if he feels the same way about me after I put a red bow around his neck to take his picture for Valentine's Day.
Thought of the day: “The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief. But the pain of grief is only a shadow when compared with the pain of never risking love.” ~Hilary Stanton Zunin
So I'm wide awake, even though it's nearly midnight on a Friday. I don't get to sleep in tomorrow because I have a training to attend, then I'm getting my hair cut. Oh well. All this being awake had me thinking and I realized something. 3 years ago today I had my first surgery (other than having teeth removed) - my tonsillectomy. Prior to my surgery I was always sick and I got strep ALL the time. I even developed an allergy to penicillin-based antibiotics... Well, I haven't had strep since my surgery (yay me!). I'm still sick a lot, but there are other things going on now - it's not strep. And although it takes me a long time to get over a cold, I'm talking weeks here people, I don't get strep anymore. This is totally a "Hallelujah" moment. Thank you Dr. Garro for taking out those little nuisances in the back of my throat, even though I was 28 and it was a risky surgery (because of my age - in the world of tonsillectomies, I was OLD). I mean, I had to spend the night in the hospital! Yuck! Oh, and the recovery was miserable, but there's no need to go there.
As I sit here writing this, I find I need another blanket. I'm cold. And I'm happy about it! It FINALLY feels like winter. According to my phone, it's 32 outside. Definitely cold. Like it should be. I'm tired of this no winter thing. It's not right. This isn't Florida. Let's have some snow please. Teachers and students would like a day or three off! Thanks. I really do enjoy winter, though. Often times I feel more artsy in winter, like there's something about the crisp air that brings out the creative side of me. Maybe it's that I was born at the end of October in Colorado... Maybe it's just how I am. To me, there's nothing better than being curled up with a mug of hot cocoa, a fuzzy warm blanket, and a good book (with the blinds open so I can watch the gently falling snow). I'd really love to get outside with my camera and take some great winter photos, but so far we haven't really had a winter to photograph. That silly little groundhog saw his shadow so we're supposed to have six more weeks of winter. Well, I'm waiting.
Thought of the day: "Let us love winter, for it is the spring of genius." ~Pietro Aretino
Isn't that what life is all about? Well, maybe it is and maybe it isn't, but I'm sure going to do my best to enjoy life. By doing this website I hope to share all the ways I am having fun. Granted, things won't always be hunky dory, but I am going to always follow my mantra "Everything happens for a reason. Just believe."
I'm happiest when doing art. In my wildest dreams I would have never thought I would say that. I used to despise art - well, except for coloring. I could color like nobody's business. But now, now it's like art is part of who I am. Without it, I wouldn't be me. I think that's rather obvious by the contents of my website.
Thought of the day: "The work you do while you procrastinate is probably the work you should be doing for the rest of your life." ~Jessica Hische